Habitat Lifestyles cold call

You know I love cold callers…

*RING RING*

Hello, is that Mr Black?
If you say so.
I am from Habitat Lifestyle & I’d like a minute to talk to you and ask some questions please.
Sure. A minute.
Is your address 123 Fir Drive?
You tell me…
And is your phone number 0123 456789?
You called me…
Okay, thank you.
No problem. My pleasure.
Please can you tell me, is your age group between 45 and 55?
Well, first can you verify who you are?
Excuse me?
I’m about to answer personal questions, so I’d like to verify who you are.
I’m from Habitat Lifestyles…
Yes, but I need to know who YOU are…
I… Me… (now confused) I… I’m Daniel…
Okay Daniel. Hi.
Hello…
What’s your mother’s maiden name?
My mother’s…
…maiden name. Yes.
Why do you need to know?
I need to verify who you are. Please tell me so I can check on my computer. It won’t take a moment.
I can’t give you…
Sure, it’s just for verification. I need to check your details…
You can check that..?
I have my computer system waiting…
Estelle Limehouse… (now really unsure).
And the name of your first pet?
I’m from Habitat Lifestyles…
Yes, and I just need your first pet’s name… You understand?
I’m just calling from Habitat Lifestyles…
I know you say that, but I need to verify it. I mean I could be calling you from the Moon!
You’re on the MOON?!?
Of course not. You asked my address earlier. That would be silly Daniel, wouldn’t it?
I, erm… Yes?
Ha! The Moon! Imagine that!
Can I ask my questions now?
Well, not really… You’ve been over a minute already.

*click*

So much fun.

My guide on enjoying them.